Siblings

It has been an auspicious weekend in a small college town in southern Ohio. My older sister threw herself a birthday party. Not your typical birthday party with balloons and cake in her living room, no she rented a hall and hired a band. And apparently ordered 19 dozen cupcakes! She is turning 60 on Wednesday (she is my much older sister...) and I guess she felt that if she didn't do something big, she may never have another chance.

This was the second of her "big parties", the first was in Tucson a month ago. In Tucson she reserved a private room at the Metropolitan Grill, designed a special menu and pre-ordered all her favorite desserts, which we all shared. This party was attended by members of my family; my older brother and his wife along with two of their kids, Larry, me, my sons, Nick and Dan, Dan's fiancee Sarah, and my parents. It was a kind of strange and awkward luncheon, as my Mom has terminal cancer and my Dad teared up when he told a story about a recent trip to the hairdressers. But this weekend was to be a party with her friends and colleagues.

Apparently she invited 160 people to this shindig. She had asked me to mark the date on my calendar while I was still in Istanbul (In March, I think). Unfortunately, I had to work on Saturday, and the meager $40.00 I made for my time and trouble is important these days. And, to be frank, I have been to her place several times and hung out with her friends and colleagues and it is not a lot of fun to hang out with a bunch of people you do not know. However, after much plotting and planning, my brother, Paul and his wife, Carole, flew from Tucson to Detroit on Friday and went to southern Ohio with my younger brother, Bill and his girlfriend. We didn't tell Cathe that they were coming, it was to be our family surprise for her big day. But before they went to Ohio, Larry and I drove to Ann Arbor to have dinner with them on Friday night.

Any time you get my brothers in the same room it is highly entertaining. They have banter and telling stories down to an art. We went to one of Bill's favorite haunts, which was packed since it was the night before a big football game. We all ate way too much food and laughed until our sides hurt. I love my brothers. (And my sister.) What is the point of all this, you may be asking? The point is this... even though we all live far away from each other, and lead very different lives, family is important. It is a 'stable datum' which helps to bring order to the chaos of our lives. I am sorry that I missed the road trip to Cathe's party. I am sorry that I missed her singing with the band she had hired. (Although she told me that if I had been there, she never would have done it - but asked me to sing with them instead.) I missed helping her figure out what to do with the dozens and dozens of cupcakes that were left over. And clean up the mess afterwards. And hanging out - the four of us. Alas, the next time we are all together will probably be connected to my Mom's passing... but even that will be nice in that we have so much shared history.